tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post3242185534727853535..comments2024-03-05T14:07:28.062-08:00Comments on Ask Sister Mary Martha: Mass SufferingSister Mary Marthahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580244097177195453noreply@blogger.comBlogger36125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-21135367778812548532013-03-21T10:34:44.830-07:002013-03-21T10:34:44.830-07:00Love this post!
I have 3 kiddos.
One is almost...Love this post! <br /><br />I have 3 kiddos. <br /><br />One is almost 7, and has autism. She generally sits pretty good for Mass, except for the random bouts of my-dog-just-died crying for-no-particular-reason, and her propensity to shout the word "potatoes!" every time someone says the name "Jesus". <br /><br />The 4 year old loves to sing and dance during Mass and fight with her brother. She also insists of sitting when it's time to stand, and stand when it's time to sit or kneel. <br /><br />The 22-month old is... a 22-month old boy. Oy vey. Keeping him contained in the pew and all the pages in the hymnal is a challenge. <br /><br />I'm generally mortified of their behaviour by the end of Mass. <br /><br />And you know what? Pretty much every week at least one (and sometimes multiple) person comes up and tells us what a blessing it is that we're there and how well behaved our children are. <br /><br />Go figure. Carolynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04121927281998746424noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-22723995311404422212008-02-12T03:22:00.000-08:002008-02-12T03:22:00.000-08:00I love you! I love your blog!I am leaving my kids ...I love you! I love your blog!<BR/><BR/>I am leaving my kids at home most Sundays, though. Because I enjoy the peace and I'm selfish.Katyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13622285332517929438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-41454822509485558922008-01-20T22:42:00.000-08:002008-01-20T22:42:00.000-08:00Wow I can't believe someone above would advocate h...Wow I can't believe someone above would advocate hitting a child during Mass! <BR/>I hope they at least have the sense to not receive Communion right after that.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-73562754877737174482008-01-19T17:29:00.000-08:002008-01-19T17:29:00.000-08:00This is one source for the "Suffer the Children" p...This is one source for the "Suffer the Children" painting:<BR/>http://picturesofjesus4you.com/311.htmlSister Mary Marthahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00580244097177195453noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-39051763141202650312008-01-19T12:24:00.000-08:002008-01-19T12:24:00.000-08:00Mary elizabeth,I'm sorry to hear that you had a ch...Mary elizabeth,<BR/><BR/>I'm sorry to hear that you had a child who just couldn't cooperate. That must have been so frustrating and draining. I was fortunate that until they were about two, both my kids were very happy to sit in my lap and nurse for most of the service. Now they beat on each other and tickle and make faces :P<BR/><BR/>We have also been encouraged by both priest and deacon to visit in the off-hours, so that the kids can get up front and take a really good look at all the "stuff" and have a chance to ask all their questions. i don't know how comon this is, but kids also bring forward cans/boxes of food from the food pantry collection box when the offering and the gifts are brought forward. Something funny usually happens :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-15432974173660139852008-01-19T11:02:00.000-08:002008-01-19T11:02:00.000-08:00My peeve: teenagers talking on their cell phones i...My peeve: teenagers talking on their cell phones in the narthex during the consecration. I couldn't take it! I walked over and said, "Father just started the consecration!" As if they didn't know. But in a way, clearly, they don't know.<BR/><BR/>My scowls are, indeed, more displeasing to God.<BR/><BR/>KellyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-67748594621093636312008-01-19T10:22:00.000-08:002008-01-19T10:22:00.000-08:00Our priest once replied to someone who complained ...Our priest once replied to someone who complained about noisy children at Mass: "Just about anything a child does during Mass is more pleasing to God than the scowl on your face."Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-40898506559326971122008-01-19T09:07:00.000-08:002008-01-19T09:07:00.000-08:00Maybe I'm in the minority, but I had good experien...Maybe I'm in the minority, but I had good experiences in the cry room. <BR/><BR/>I had a child who was a runner and would not be held. If you tried to hold her it would be a wrestling match and you would not win. Put her in an open space and she would run. <BR/><BR/>She was also a screamer from the time she was an infant. In the church she would scream. I'm talking infant, not a child you can teach. You can't teach a newborn to 6 month old NOT to scream. She was fed, clean/dry, etc. She couldn't handle the aucostics of the church was my conclusion.<BR/><BR/>I changed parishes to get a cry room because otherwise I had to leave mass due to screaming.<BR/><BR/>We sat in the first row of the cryroom. I don't remember it being like a playroom, but then I didn't see what was going on behind us.<BR/><BR/>The only bad experience was on an Easter morning. I had such a headache it was loud, crowded and full of sugared up kids.<BR/><BR/>Normally the cryroom was not that full. And a lot of elderly folks sit in the cryroom because it's less of a walk than into the church itself.<BR/><BR/>I weaned my daughter into the church we would sit part time in each room until she could behave well enough. When she could sit through the mass without running (the screaming did stop as she got closer to a year old) we sat in the front, but to the side of the altar (round church).<BR/><BR/>I did not have a spouse to watch her (he is not Catholic and was working Sat afternoons and all day Sunday) or any relatives that lived close enough to help. I did the best I could. If I didn't find the new parish and the cryroom I would've been leaving early or missing mass altogether.<BR/><BR/>If I had someone to help I would've just left her home until she was old enough to sit through the mass with just the usual reminders to behave. But under age 3 it was a struggle to take her.<BR/><BR/>I've always envied the people that can hold their babies and toddlers through mass and they sleep or coo or jabber a bit. That was just not my girl's personality at all.<BR/><BR/>mary elizabethAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-33495409484696645212008-01-19T05:32:00.000-08:002008-01-19T05:32:00.000-08:00Hi sister, love your blog, and informed three of m...Hi sister, <BR/>love your blog, and informed three of my sisters about it. <BR/>On kids at mass, I have a 9 year old girl, and twin four year old boys: <BR/> The groans and tutting I experienced while at midweek mass with them, were more distracting than the kids playing up ~ it would echo around the church for all to hear. <BR/>Feeling unsupported from the pulpit, I had to approach the offenders myself. and gently said that I was doing my best, but it was "was hard work".<BR/>Some folks said I was "brave" to bring them and put up with the "cat calling" from the "congregation." I think they must have got used to us now: seeing that the heckling did not work, they know we are there to stay.<BR/>BTW, I always now wear a veil at church, or a small hat. (The kids like to tug at the veil...when there is a lull...)I still get funny looks and some funny comments, but I don't really care, its between me and God.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-5621933396332386442008-01-18T20:55:00.000-08:002008-01-18T20:55:00.000-08:00Wow! Santo Nino de Atocha, I'm sorry I thought you...Wow! Santo Nino de Atocha, I'm sorry I thought you were a girl. Clothing styles have changed just a bit. (Even our image of a pilgrim is different--I thought they all had big black hats and shoes with buckles!) What I took for a scepter is actually a water-gourd stick. Thank you for that information.<BR/><BR/>Just Me--I asked a Mexican woman about your saint and she didn't know, either, but she says she only knows the Guadalajara region of Mexico. I said I didn't know what region you'd visited, but she said in Mexico city they have "Lots and lots of different saints all over the place."Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-14265018656282748272008-01-18T16:07:00.000-08:002008-01-18T16:07:00.000-08:00I am a priest and I love when children are in the ...I am a priest and I love when children are in the Church. When they cry they remind us to love each other, even those little kids. And we have to accept all people as they are. If we accept only those people that can behave according to our wishes in fact we love more ourselves than those poeple.<BR/>We must accept the otherness of the other!!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-27164243303340455862008-01-18T13:51:00.000-08:002008-01-18T13:51:00.000-08:00I have to second the opinion of the writer who sai...I have to second the opinion of the writer who said she felt more welcome in the Catholic Church with her children. We have friends who were physically prevented from bringing their children into the regular Sunday worship service. They are not Catholic, YET, but they were church shopping and crossed that one off their list.<BR/><BR/>When our children were small and restless I would hold them on my lap and scratch their backs or whisper little stories or songs to them. I wanted them to associate the Mass with feelings of warmth and goodness. Not with being yanked around and scolded and punished all the time. It seems those children check out as soon as they are old enough. Who wants to go someplace where you get spanked every Sunday??? You know what? Our way worked.....they are all orthodox, practicing Catholics who love the Mass. I know I can't take ALL the credit for that, but hey, I'll take a little.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-50371454312821920672008-01-18T13:44:00.000-08:002008-01-18T13:44:00.000-08:00Our pastor used to say "If anyone complains to you...Our pastor used to say "If anyone complains to you about the children at Mass, tell them I said THEY are free not to come!"<BR/>He was a holy, crusty, sometimes grumpy old guy....but we loved him.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-21526655647451926472008-01-18T10:49:00.000-08:002008-01-18T10:49:00.000-08:00Oh, my. Please don't spank kids for not being abl...Oh, my. Please don't spank kids for not being able to control themselves in Mass. It's *tough* to sit still and quietly when they can't understand everything going on. Take them out if they can't handle it, but please don't hit them. What kind of an awful connection is that to make? I want my kids to know that they need to be respectful and they will not be permitted to be disrespectful, because we will leave, but I would never spank them for it. There are plenty of times when I am not as respectful as I should be, but because I'm an adult, I can do it in hidden, socially acceptable ways. God has yet to whack me for it. AFAICT, He would far prefer to gently bring me back to attention.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-65137570647441778222008-01-18T10:28:00.001-08:002008-01-18T10:28:00.001-08:00Rambling speech, (whisper) "Can you turn the soun...Rambling speech,<BR/> (whisper) "Can you turn the sound off, please? I can't hear Father".<BR/><BR/>Give them 45 seconds.<BR/>whisper, as calmly as before. "I still can't hear Father"<BR/><BR/>Do the same with adults who talk on their cell phones during Mass.<BR/><BR/>Great post, Sister. One point, though. If you say "don't run" they can pretend they only heard the word "run". I say "walk".<BR/><BR/>The funniest (and saddest, really) was at a Christmas Eve CHILDREN'S Mass. It was SRO and there were children making noises, just the background murmuring you always hear. In the middle of the first reading, an old man exclaimed in a loudish voice, "I can't hear a thing with all these G*D* kids in here!"Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-1079569209446987042008-01-18T10:28:00.000-08:002008-01-18T10:28:00.000-08:00I always veil durring Mass, but I feel that I am b...I always veil durring Mass, but I feel that I am being lead to have my hair covered outside of Mass as well. I lift t up to the Lord,and find it very eyeopening.It keeps me intune more spiritualy.Plus I really don't want men looking at me other than myhusband. I feel like the Holy Spirit is leading me to do this daily,and really wanted to talk to Sister Mary Martha about it.Im looking forward to hearing your comments sister.God Bless,and thank you,<BR/>MaryMaryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03783381041544010611noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-12293075227002393802008-01-18T10:15:00.000-08:002008-01-18T10:15:00.000-08:00I enjoyed this post and all the comments. I would ...I enjoyed this post and all the comments. I would like to add to the above question regarding veiling. This is only regarding veiling for mass. Sister, could you please inform us about the original reason for women (non religious) veiling for mass? Why did this practice stop? Was it a requirement that was actually changed or is it a case of mass-disobedience? I've noticed some women at my parish start wearing them - more so at the latin masses, but now also at the novus ordo. I was told also that the requirement was never abrogated - is this true??Sanctus Bellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06189142564821094716noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-47582399944520692652008-01-18T08:29:00.000-08:002008-01-18T08:29:00.000-08:00no fair, Martha. I still don't know who my bald s...no fair, Martha. I still don't know who my bald scowling saint with the skull at his feet is!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-57785754041743561162008-01-18T06:28:00.000-08:002008-01-18T06:28:00.000-08:00Thanks for encouraging readers to bring their chil...Thanks for encouraging readers to bring their children to Mass. We bring ours, and while we sometimes have had to flee to the foyer (our nursery is no longer available), we do think it important to keep them in the church. I do think a cry room is a good idea though, for nursing moms who are uncomfortable nursing in the actual church. Some of us are just not good at being appropriately discreet. Anyway, thanks for the positive encouragement.nicolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06605426195521274662noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-37643807313933291482008-01-18T06:12:00.000-08:002008-01-18T06:12:00.000-08:00I think it's a lack of discipline. I acted up in c...I think it's a lack of discipline. I acted up in church once. My mother promptly removed me from my pew, dragged me to the ladies room and to the hearty approval of all present gave me a old fashioned spanking. She never had a problem with me again.Dymphnahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01469622835449220113noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-61274091451491220222008-01-18T05:14:00.000-08:002008-01-18T05:14:00.000-08:00Yes, Jane Ramsey, we all have to be careful when w...Yes, Jane Ramsey, we all have to be careful when we type, because we may spell something incorrectly, such as "alter for altar". I've been chastised by the grammar police, too. Sorry, people, but some of us do type fast and don't always check and re-check to see if our grammar is spot-on, because we are more concerned with making our point.<BR/><BR/>Love this post, SMM!Sarah - Kalahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17877449375576975508noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-11109235903282307132008-01-18T03:47:00.000-08:002008-01-18T03:47:00.000-08:00Wondeful reflection, Sister. I would love to put t...Wondeful reflection, Sister. I would love to put this in our Church bulletin! :-)<BR/>(BTW, your commenters are just all over the map, aren't they? Keep those apostrophes comin'!)Jane Ramseyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13456875269041136328noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-50735377193711012222008-01-18T03:38:00.000-08:002008-01-18T03:38:00.000-08:00Oh, no! Sister, you've gone and abused the apostr...Oh, no! Sister, you've gone and abused the apostrophe, not once, but twice!<BR/><BR/>The primary use of apostrophes is contractions, such as it's (it is), that's (that is), won't (will not), can't (cannot), and the like. I know of no contraction that becomes show's.<BR/><BR/>The secondary use of contractions is genitive forms which I think is supposed to exclude all pronouns. Thus, Sister's thing, the car's thing, the Church's thing, and so forth are correct, but we don't use apostrophes for his, hers, mine, yours, theirs, ours, or its thing. This is especially true of its, because it's is always only used for it is.Arkanabar Ilarsadinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00098504849466846551noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-57481656319234952842008-01-18T01:53:00.000-08:002008-01-18T01:53:00.000-08:00Sister- Off-topic I know, but where did you get th...Sister- Off-topic I know, but where did you get that last pic of Jesus with the children? I want to know who painted it so I can look for a print.PraiseDivineMercyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15000747762174079070noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30512717.post-2245226911509466102008-01-17T22:22:00.000-08:002008-01-17T22:22:00.000-08:00That's the Santo Nino de Atocha. It's a child Jes...That's the Santo Nino de Atocha. It's a child Jesus. Here's the story (scroll down a bit until you see His picture):<BR/>http://www.fisheaters.com/childjesus.htmlSister Mary Marthahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00580244097177195453noreply@blogger.com