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Life is tough. Nuns are tougher.

Saturday, March 03, 2007

St. Zinc

We thank everyone for the get well wishes. So far Sister Mary Fiacre and I have avoided the miserable cold and Sister St. Aloysius is on the upswing. I would like to think that our Blessed Mother has smiled upon us, but I think the real miracle is in that fizzy stuff, "Airborn." There must be zinc in it. That, or someone has substituted Lourdes water in the Arrowhead jug.

Years ago I discovered, all on my own, that taking zinc kept away cold viruses as efficiently as the blood on the door jambs of the Chosen People kept away the plague of the first born in Moses' time.

No one believed me. I had to listen to people yammer about echinacea and golden root and vitamin C. I kept telling everyone that if you took zinc at the first sign of a cold, you wouldn't get the cold. And if you somehow managed to get the cold, it would be a quick easy cold.

No one paid attention.




No one pays attention when I tell them that if they use only cotton hankies to blow their noses after their echinacea and golden root and vitamin C fails them....as it always does...their noses will never get sore from blowing, even after the 439th time they've blown. That's because no matter how much lotion you put in a Kleenex, you are still blowing your nose in chunks of wood. Of course it's going to get sore.

"But Sister, having those used hankies around! The germs! Everyone will get the cold!"

Take zinc.

Now it turns out13 years later, it has been scientifically proven that zinc surrounds a virus and starves it to death. Guess what has been scientifically proven to do nothing?

You believe what I have to tell you about missing Mass on Sunday, eating meat on Friday, and wearing a hat in church. Why would I give you a bum steer on zinc?

I doesn't hurt to light a candle to St. Blaise, either. I think of St. Blaise as the patron saint of colds and flu because he is the patron saint of throat problems. We have to extrapolate because we don't have an officially named patron saint of colds and flu, although we have many saints for plagues. Not specifically named plagues. Any plague will do. Any saint who survived a plague, like St. Roch, gets "plague" tacked on to his or her patronage, I've noticed.

After that you have to go through symptom by symptom. St. Bernadette for aches and pains, St. Stephen, the first martyr (he was stoned to death) for headaches, etc.

Just don't forget about St. Zinc and St. Cotton Hankie.

13 comments:

Sister Brittany said...

You are so funny... I love your blog.

I noticed that you do not have a blogroll... well at any rate, I just wanted to ask your readers to check out my blog at www.intothedeep.wordpress.com because I am entering the convent on August 4 th and am trying to raise money to pay off my student loans! (So far I have $2750 to go.)

I do not know if you'd mind doing a plug for me? Or at least direct everyone to http://intothedeep.wordpress.com/2007/03/03/thank-you-for-the-hits/

Thank you for your blog -- it really lightens up my day! :-)

cattiekit said...

To change the topic totally from the comment above..... ????

But I *do* totally believe in St. Zinc and St. Cotton Hankie!

I was rubbing my eyes into the consistency of steak tartare(also known as *hamburger*) using those Kleenex with Aloe and Lotion.

Switched to a cotton bandana? Mucho betteroso.

My husband hates those Kleenex with lotion anyhoo. Smears his glasses up something *awful*.

And he *has* been known to use those Cold-Eze thingies with zinc. Even though they taste awful. :>)

Anonymous said...

I wish I could take zinc but my OB/Gyn told me not to take too much during pregnancy so there is some in my prenatal vitamin, but I am not supposed to take more than that.

I am not pregnant now, but I want to be (if it is God's will). I have four but I want more (you know, for His kingdom)!

So I guess I will have to stay away from higher zinc doses until menopause!

The cotton hankie advice is very good--thanks!

Anonymous said...

suzanne, I took zinc throughout my pregnancies and have 6 healthy kids, so either I didn't take too much or it isn't so bad. I'm always suspicious of Dr's who recommend the same amount of say, folic acid, for their 20 year old patients as their 40 year old patients. (Marilyn Shannon's book 'Fertility, Cycles, and Nutrition is really helpful. Not that you asked, but doesn't everyone give unasked for advice to parents??) Now I'll go back to minding my own business. Sorry.

Anonymous said...

Thanks, Monica! Hey my OB/GYN is wrong in many areas (including prescribing contraceptives) so he can be wrong about this, too. I researched it and thought that I had read the same research that too much zinc was bad for pregnant women--I guess I need to read some more!

I stick with my Dr., however, to try to be salt and light--I think it's working!

Laura The Crazy Mama said...

I agree, sister, last year I took a c/zinc/d vitamin EVERY DAY and I didn't have one, single cold. This year I sort of took extra c when I felt a cold coming on...hahahahahahah.

PraiseDivineMercy said...

lol.. My grandma always used to prescribe Zinc, but I never believed her... Alas.

CMinor said...

I'm with cattiekit's husband. Nothing worse than lotion-smeared specs!

Anonymous said...

I keep a cotton hankie in the sleeve of my habit. I have brown hankies to match the garment of Francis. The brothers have been spreading their germs all over the friary. True to my vow of poverty, I am trying not to pick them up.

peace
Frater

cattiekit said...

Dearest Frater,

Is it allowable for you to have *Purell* around the monastery? ;>D

cattiekit said...

cminor, my husband thanks you from the bottom of his Kleenex-hating heart. :>D

Anonymous said...

I love the stuff... but I am sure that there is a friar around who would object to killing germs by claiming that germs are part of the animal kingdom and as such would deserve love and understanding.

cattiekit said...

Dearest Frater,

Perhaps your colleague is a misplaced Buddhist? ;>D