Another Movie Lesson Plan

We were parked in front of CNN, as is our habit, to see what we need to be praying for. Both Sister St. Aloysius and I are originally from the Midwest, so we are watching the tornado news with sadness and a deep sense of familiarity.

When I was a little girl I was terrified of the very idea that a tornado could come through like a train of wind, the finger of God, and suck my house up and take it to Oz. I wouldn't have known much about tornadoes if it had not been for the Wizard of Oz. That's how I learned about tornadoes and that I lived in Tornado Alley.

Only I knew there was no Oz. Thank you, Catholic school education. I knew what really happened to the people and houses and cows that got hit. Certainly there are no ruby slippers involved. Flying monkeys would be welcome to pick up the debris.

Since I've known all of this since I was age 5 or so, I was shocked to hear the White House Press secretary, Mr. Tony Snow, trying to tell reporters that 'you can't prepare for these things.' He was responding to questions put to him about the governor of Kansas. She had thanked the President for a quick response, but mentioned that the equipment needed for cleaning up is scarce because so much of it is in Iraq. She's not the only governor who has mentioned this problem.

We're already been praying for Mr. Snow because he's been so sick, poor man. I've had chemotherapy myself and I can tell you that while you're having it, you turn stupid. You just can't think. You're all foggy. One day, while surfing the internets, I actually found a term for it, "chemo brain." Go ahead....look on the Google. I'll wait......

Once while I was on chemotherapy I watched a low speed car chase for more than two hours that ended only after the fleeing suspect ran out of gas. He had been driving with his tires blown out (from that nail strip thing they use on fleeing suspects) for an hour or so. I can tell you exactly what I was thinking the whole time I was watching it "hummmmmmmmmm m..." If you had been inside my brain you'd have thought I was a Buddhist.


This is the only explanation I can think of for why anyone would think that there might not be any tornadoes in Kansas this year, so very little equipment would be necessary. That or they've never heard of Oz.

By the way, it should all serve as a reminder to wear your scapular! Or make sure you have one of those "In Case of Emergency Please Call a Priest" cards or medals. Contrary to what Mr. Snow has to say, you can be prepared.

Just don't think for a minute that you can put on that scapular and frolick off to stare at the "Black Snake Moan" poster or the like. Yes, Mary promised us that if we wear the scapular we will not see the fires of hell. But you're not going to get away with trying to fool Mary. The tornado will suck the scapular right off your neck before it lands you in the ditch head first to be identified only by your unusual toes.

You'll have to really be prepared.