Although I am always tickled pink to find Catholic clergy and religious with their noses to the fund raising for a worthy cause grindstone, especially in these days when the really good work they do is buried under the weight of the sins of a few, this is not the news I wanted to hear.
"Catholic Priest Floats Away on Party Balloons."
It seems Father Carli, down there in Brazil, was trying to raise money for a spiritual truck stop. That was a really good idea. Sometimes the truckers there have to wait for hours and hours at the docks for their shipments to come in and load. What a lovely thought that the men could spend that time in prayer! Better than many of the alternatives. Very many. Of the alternatives.
But, to raise this money, Father Carli decided to try to break the world's record of the longest flight with party balloons tied to a chair. I'm not clear on just how this was going to raise money. Maybe people were involved in a pool as to where he would land, or just taking bets on whether the balloons would lift him or not.
Father Carli zoomed into the sky in his party balloon chair, disappeared into the clouds and has yet to be found. He wasn't totally hair brained. He had one of those tracking devices like you have in your SUV, a thermal suit, a floaty chair. I hope he had lunch. His chances are good, as the water is really warm right now.
We're praying for the intercession of St. Anthony.
Is there a patron saint for people trying to lose weight? I could use all the help I can get...
Thank you and God bless!
Sure there is! There are two ways you can go.
A fat saint: Thomas Aquinas. More than one priest that I know, when they want to
answer the question "how fat was he?", will answer with, "as fat as Thomas Aquinas." Although I have heard that St. Thomas had some sort of unfortunate glandular issue that caused him much suffering, the fact is he was fat. Very fat. Famously fat. He cut a semi circle in the dining table so he could sit closer.
"Fatty fatty two by four,
can't get through the kitchen door. " One of my mother's favorite poems.
Here lies the body of Anna,
done to death by a banana.
It wasn't the fruit that made her go,
but the skin of the thing that laid her low.
Or my all time favorite:
Of all the dumb surprises,
there's none that can compare,
with stepping in the darkness
on a step that isn't there.
You have to think about that one for a second.
So...Thomas Aquinas, who was called, "The Dumb Ox" in school and who became a Doctor of the Church, in fact, one of the greatest Doctors of the Church ever, would be a good way to go.
Or you could go in the other direction, a really thin saint, with St. Catherine of Sienna. She had to have been very thin. It has been said that she survived for long periods of time with only the Host to sustain her. She didn't sleep much either.
And she didn't live very long.
But for sticking to a diet, who could be better? And on top of that, she is a Doctor of the Church as well! There are only three woman who have that title, two Theresa's (St. Theresa the Little Flower and Teresa of Avila) and Catherine.
Hope this helps!
And for Father Carli, instead of the usual, "Holy Tony come on down, something's lost and can't be found", we're going with this prayer, written shortly after the death of St. Anthony, by one of his contemporaries, Julian of Spires:
The sea obeys and fetters break
And lifeless limbs thou dost restore
While treasures lost are found again
When young or old thine aid implore.