Sunday, January 18, 2009
One would think that since we are in Ordinary Time now, it would be a great time to get our ducks in a row. I don't even know where our ducks are to line them up. We never did get that tarp on the roof. Thankfully, it has hardly rained, but that's not a good thing, really. Our garden is an overgrown mess again. That crazy morning glory has taken over both sides of the house.
I had a friend who used to say, "Every time you see a light at the end of the tunnel, they build a new tunnel."
There has been one great stride. Our plumbing, which is a constant struggle that often ends in a hallway full of raw sewage, is working better than ever, thanks to this clever device. It is an air plunger that shoots an air bomb through the pipes. It worked when we were at our wit's end. Even after a plumber had walked on the scary roof and snaked the drain the tub wasn't normal. It took so long for the tub to drain, no matter how fast we tried to shower, that we had to change our schedules around the tub drain time.
Now the tub is on Ordinary Time, too. We don't even know how to behave.
What is your take on public/parochial/Christian/homeschooling? I'd like to know a nun's official view. We're struggling to find the best education for our children and public school just isn't cutting it. Private is good, but on one, not very substantial, income it's daunting trying to find a place we can afford. Based on the tuition scales I keep telling my husband we need to have another child and convert in order to afford it.
I have said before that I think you are right out of your cotton pickin' mind to want to homeschool. Since you asked.
First, you have children of all ages. An actual teacher in a classroom only has to deal with one set of physical, social, psychological and educational needs. Everyone is learning to add or everyone is learning algebra. Everyone is learning to share or everyone is wondering about their first kiss.
At home, you may be learning to add, learning shapes, changing a diaper, surfing the internet, choosing appropriate reading material, reading it all yourself first for all six grade levels, or seven grade levels or however many school age children you have, burping the baby, American history, world history, growing an avocado tree with toothpicks in a paper cup, geometry, long division, cutting shapes out of construction paper, geography and trying to stop the baby from running out of the house naked.
And you still have to be the mom.
And you have to teach them all about Jesus and the Catholic Church.
Your home must be a little like the Italian plate act. You remember that. Some guy has a whole
line of poles and he takes a plate and puts it on top of the first pole and spins it and then he puts a plate on top of the second pole and spins it and the third and so on. By the time he gets to the fourth or fifth plate on the fourth or fifth pole, the first plate is slowing down enough that he has to dash back there and give it a good spin and then run back to the seventh pole and put another plate on and then he has to run back to the second and third poles and give them a spin and then back over to the sixth pole and spin that again and put on a new plate and then run back...
Welcome to home schooling!
Where did all the teaching nuns go? I don't know. They must be with our ducks somewhere.
My hat's off to homeschoolers. I wouldn't want to do it. I would much rather have a room of thirty kids or more all doing the same thing, except for that one kid who won't sit down no matter what I do (I'll just make him the window monitor and he can open and close the windows all day and grow up to be the school janitor). Children herd very well once you teach them how to make a straight line. Ducks have nothing on a roomful of second graders.
Since there aren't any nuns to herd your children into the fold anymore, it does seem to me that homeschooling is your best option, God help you. It's very noble of you to even consider taking it on.
There is a very special place in heaven for you, I'm sure. It's very quiet. All the chairs are comfortable and someone else makes all the dinners and brings them over to you. You are never tired and there is no dust, no clutter and no one's nose is running.