Tuesday, December 08, 2009
The biggest discussion we've had going on has been over the strapless wedding gown dilemma. It didn't seem like such a terrible dilemma to me and neither does this dust up:
Followup wedding question: My 40-some-year old aunt announced last summer that she's marrying her long-term live in boyfriend. I was very happy for her. Then she mentioned that he's divorced. And she doesn't want any presents from me...she just wants me to come to the wedding.
Now I don't have any idea what to do. She converted from Catholicism to something related to Mennonites years ago. She said for all they know the ex-wife is deceased but I'm not sure how much detective work I want to put into this (and I don't want to wish anyone dead!)
I contemplated making up some excuse for not going but a. I really can't think of one and b. this seems like the wimpy way out. I love my aunt, I want her to know I love her, but I can't think of any solution that doesn't come as a slap in the face to her and have the whole family denouncing me as an evil bigot(ok, I'm exagerating. Slightly)
And I'm spending Christmas with all of them. Help!
Just go to the wedding and keep your trap shut. Your patron saint of the day: St. Raymond Nonnatus, who had his yapper padlocked to stop his incessant preaching.
News flash: Catholics are allowed to go to other churches and denominations and sit in attendance at whatever is going on there short of genuine evil and Satanic rituals. Once they avoid anything involving Ouija Boards, Catholics can trot on over and celebrate the weddings of their Separated Brethren, be they Baptist, Episcopalian, Presbyterian or Mennonites.
Consider yourself off the hook as the Catholic police for this one. You beloved Auntie was a Catholic. She knows the rules. Of course we are concerned with the state of her immortal soul, but.....
Where was everybody while she was living in with the live in boyfriend? is what I'd like to know. Suddenly, the wedding is a problem?
Look at it this way: when a person takes on evangelizing and trudges into a halfway house, the first move is not to finger wag about what a bunch of hopeless sinners they all are. First, we take care of the body, the safety, the sense of well being and pull the person back from the brink. All the while, we lead by example and we gently nudge and pray and always hope.
You've missed your window of opportunity for scolding. All that is left is to try love. St. Micheal the Archangel
Patron Saint of Police