Of course it has occurred to me to stick a witch hat on my head for Halloween and call it a day, costume wise. Okay....I've actually done that.
But then, everyone has an opinion. They say, "A nun shouldn't be dressing like a witch, a person who invokes Satan!"
And I say, "There are no witches, you silly goose, just people who wish they were witches or think they are witches. These people have no actual power other than perhaps leading the weak minded astray. And although that is a bad thing, we all understand that I am not a witch, I am not trying to lead anyone astray and that this is merely a hat posing as a costume for one day of some fun with candy. Go park your high horse somewhere else."
Truth be told, sometimes my sense of humor does give people a comedy hair cut as it slides over their heads. My witch hat is a joke on myself and my ability to scare little children senseless by merely showing up anywhere. I've often thought to myself, "All I need is a pointy hat."
So for one day a year, I go for it while I pass out candy.
To be honest, I've never known any nuns who dressed up for Halloween, save maybe putting on some type of hat. Apparently I lead a sheltered life, as a dear reader sent me this gem.
Holy Toledo! They even have tiny eyes glued on there! We had to laugh at the number of tiny eyes. Can you tell that nuns are always on a budget? "We have six doll eyes, Sister. You take three and I'll have three."
"Oh no, Sister, you have all six!"
"I wouldn't dream of it. If I have all six, how will anyone know you are a potato?"
Slow as I am, it took me several minutes to understand what those signs meant.
Poor sad old me.
And so, with All Souls Day and All Saints Day behind us, we press on:
Hi Sr. I just love your blog! I have a saint-match question for you, if you do not mind. I am expecting our 8th child in June (we just found out) and I'm worried we will not be able to pick out a name for him/her. It has gotten harder every time! Can you recommend a patron saint for choosing a child's name?
What an odd problem! Too many cooks? Here's the thing: You will be able to pick out a name for him/her. The child will not go through life nameless. No one will be referring to the child as "Child 8" or "Hey You".
You might need a patron saint for needless worry. St. Teresa of Avila, I think, the patron saint of perfectionists who are not perfect.
Meanwhile, I'm going to suggest St. Raymond Nonnatus who is the patron saint of tiny babies.
My thought process is thus: Babies are named when they are tiny, sometimes even before they are born. Whatever havoc is wreaked on a child by the name with which he is saddled starts right there.
There was a mayor of Pittsburgh, for example, whose name was Mayor Barr. He named his two children "Candy" and "Clark". I wish I were joking. What fun it must have been for Candy Barr and Clark Barr to introduce themselves all their lives!
Meanwhile, may I suggest that if you are actually at a loss for names you simply go to the list of saints of the Catholic Church. Your head will spin.
Sister, I'm in a quandary...There's a young man in my confirmation class. He's looking for a patron saint. He is an avid snowboarder...and he insists that this is in no way the same as skiing! So, St. Bernard and even JP II are out (although I assured him that if JP II were young today, he would definitely be a snowboarder!) Can you help me out please?
I'm not certain that my answer will actually please him anymore than yours does. He clearly doesn't understand the concept of patron saint extrapolation. There is no actual saint of snowboarders and the only way he will find one is through extrapolation, poor thing. Hopefully, one day he himself will become a saint and we will finally have a patron saint of snow boarding.
However, I do believe I can bring him one step closer to the right saint. Here is where my years on the coast of California finally pay off!
Surfers have a patron saint! They have officially adopted St. Christopher, who bore Christ across the water. They all wear St. Christopher medals!
Snowboarding is surfing on snow. I recommend St. Christopher. And I'm apparently not alone in my assessment.