I love it when the questions are super easy to answer, especially in the summer!:
As I said, I'm becoming Catholic - finished RCIA
and am waiting and praying for my husband's first marriage to be
declared null so I can finally come home. During the RCIA process, one
of the events that changed my thinking from "Oh, I suppose I can do
this Catholic thing to make my husband happy" to "Oh please. Only say
the word and my soul shall be healed. Please may I come home?" was a
miscarriage. I lost my fifth child at four months gestation, and it all
but broke me. I am still so very sad.
The day we found out she'd
died, my husband and I went to the Adoration Chapel, a place I'd always
felt very uncomfortable in. That day I was just so shocked and sad. I
knelt and prayed and wept and shook. And then I looked up and realized
that Jesus was there. Not like "I feel Him here," he WAS THERE, because
he said he would be. Not because I deserved it or asked Him the right
way, because He promised. It totally spun my thinking around on the
I told a friend about that, and she said, "You know
what that was? That was your daughter, praying for you, and taking you
by the hand into the Truth."
So this leads to my question. We named
our daughter Eva. And since losing her has made this whole process of
conversion so much more real and personal to me, I want to take Eva as
my patron saint. From what I can tell, there was a Saint Eva, from the
third century, who was a mother with four children, no less. But
really, I mean it in gratitude for the life of my little one and what
her loss has taught me about what really matters. Do you think that
would be okay?
Thank you for what you do here. I'm a little scared of you, but much more grateful for your insight.
On come on. I'm not that scary. Unless you're under the age of 7. Then I'm terrifying. Even if I'm smiling. Perhaps, then even more so.
Welcome to the Church!
Now to your question. You can have anyone you want as a patron saint. Oh, wait...did you mean you want to take your daughter as your patron saint? That would be okay, I guess. We know she's in Heaven, which is the definition of a saint.
However, when we look to find a patron saint, we look for someone to help us through our struggles. That's why we first make sure a person had heroic virtue--virtue above and beyond the call of duty--for the cause of a saint. We generally don't call on the non canonized as patron saints.
Your St. Eva from the third century was a martyr, but I'm not sure the children who died with her were her children. She died with a rather large group of people, five of whom were children...four children and a toddler. But that's okay. Martyrs go straight to Heaven and are automatically saints. (The only time we argue over the sainthood of a martyr is when we're not sure if the person's demise was in fact a maytyr's death. Such is the case with St. Theresa Benedicta of the Cross, better known as Edith Stein. She was both Jewish and then a nun, so there was considerable argument over whether her death at the hands of the Nazis made for a martyr's death, since she might have been murdered because she was Jewish, as opposed to being murdered because she refused to renounce Christ. She was canonized, so the controversy has been resolved.)
So, that St. Eva from the third century is fine. But....this will tickle you! There is another Eva, not a saint yet. Blessed Eva. That means she is worthy of our veneration and has one proven miracle. She's waiting for another before she makes it to 'saint'. Here's the part that you'll appreciate: she was instrumental in making the Feast of Corpus Christi and feast day!
The Feast of Corpus Christi is the day the whole Church celebrates the fact that the Blessed Sacrament is the True Presence. Blessed Eva didn't start the ball rolling. Her superior, St. Julianna did that. St. Julianna had a vision of the moon with one dark spot on it, a symbolic depiction of the one missing feast day in the Church calendar. She had this vision for twenty years but never told anyone about it, except for Blessed Eva. St. Julianna didn't know what the vision meant for the longest time, and when she finally came to understand its meaning, she still didn't tell anyone about it because she didn't think there was anything she could do about it. When she finally told her confessor, he took the information to the Bishop and the Bishop made the feast day happen, but just locally.
It wasn't until St. had died that Blessed Eva took up the gauntlet and worked tirelessly until the Pope made the Feast of Corpus Christi a feast day for the universal Church.
How's that for a kind of perfect patron saint for you? I hope it tickles you as much as it tickles me!