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Life is tough. Nuns are tougher.

Sunday, December 23, 2007

A Little Rum, a Little Brandy

We are surprisingly relaxed this season, as well we should be, since Jesus is about to arrive. We somehow got ahead of ourselves. Today we made little pumpkin and cranberry loaves to hand out to anyone who drops by. When does that happen? I am at the ready to turn on the Christmas lights.

So here I am to wish you all a Merry Christmas. I mean that. I hope it's joyous and pious and holy and all of that. But mostly I hope it's merry. Get out and get some eggnog while you have the chance. Spike it if you like. We're not Baptists.

Lent is right around the corner.

And I have time for a few questions:
I really want to believe - in you. But how to you manage to be so hopelessly hip, graphically apropos and theologically correct, all while dealing with your daily life and taking care of Sr. Mary Fiacre? Also, what happened to your post from December 15th, where you "elfed" yourself (which I have gotten over being freaked out about)....

When did I become Santa? I'm not even a saint.

How do I do it? After years and years of classrooms full of (sixty! during the baby boom years!) kids this is a snap a breeze a snap. I have been asked every question in the book. If I didn't know the answer then, I do now. I'm not going to get stumped twice by fourth graders. Here's a lightening bolt for you: if you don't know something, you can look it up. Of course, I"m here to help you with that. But if I need help....

....I have continuing access to young people As a result, I know how to travel the internets, work the google, all that sort of thing. If I get stuck or I manage to erase something or loose it in the computer, I find a seventh grader to come and retrieve it for me.

This site--blogger--makes putting up the blog itself a breeze a snap a breeze. I have learned to type whatever it is I'm looking for in the search bar of the google, no matter how absurd it may sound ("mean looking nun", "shriner on a scooter", "cuddly Santa"), and hit 'images'. Pages and pages of images are at my fingertips. You wouldn't believe the things that have burned my eyeballs when I typed in the most innocuous things. Never type in "old ladies". Really, don't.

Also, I read the newspaper. Except, obviously, I don't read the sports section to find out who won the game. Who did win that Rockets/Nuggets game?

And when all is said and done, as I'm sure many people who have to care for other people who are relatively helpless will tell you, once you get into a routine, it just becomes your routine. We have it down to a science. Sister St. Aloysius' orderly and scientific mind has been a bonus.

After I 'elfed' myself and it scared you, I took it down because I didn't want to scare anybody else. The seventh grade boys loved it, though.

Can a Catholic widow join a convent, if her kids are grown and such. If not as a nun, then as the world's oldest novice, maybe? Don't worry, my husband's safe and I don't have a calling. I just wondered if women still did that, like in Medievel times, when they spent their waning years praying and doing good works.

She sure can!

But only if the convent lets her.

You can't just run out and become a nun. You'd think you could, what with the shortage and all. But no. By the time you're done checking out the convent and the convent is done checking out you, you'll feel like you're on Meet The Press running for president. They can turn you down like some TV insurance company if you are really too old or not very healthy.

I find that ironic, since so many saints, especially those who were religious and clergy, were so stunningly ill all the time. If they let in Bernadette, who was never well a day in her life, they should let in your friend. IMHO. But that doesn't mean they will.

For future reference, as women live longer than men on the average, you might want to leave some microwave dinners in the freezer for DH and start the process now. Add some weight lifting to your daily routine, too.

I'm kidding.

"The poem doesn't say he's fat. Does it?"

I believe it mentions his belly being like a bowlful of jelly. It's implied that he's fat.

I believe I addressed that.

Love your site always insightful and religious teachings with the modern world mixed in. I think i would certainly enjoy conversing with you.
I am a Raptors fan and right now praying for TJ Ford to be healthy.
As mentioned love your site and I will be checking in daily!
Thanks and God Bless!

Thank you very much! A Raptors fan, eh? Good luck with that.

I have extra time, which means extra prayers. My Christmas gift to you all!
Merry Christmas to all!


Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas from South Dakota!!!

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas from Alaska!

Eddie said...

Merry Christmas from Georgia, Sister Mary Martha!

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas from the great white north. Burlington, Ontario Canada.
May God Bless you and have a wonderful and joyous Christmas

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas from Texas! Thank you for the prayers - i'll be praying for you as well.

Unknown said...

Merry Christmas from Georgia, Sister! Thank you for your great blog!

Redtabby said...

Merry Christmas from Virginia. I'll be reading your blog eagerly in 2008, for sure.

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas from New Hampshire! The more I read your blog the more I appreciate what you're doing.

Alice G.

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas from Maryland. I went to Catholic school back when there were 60 some children in a class. I love reading your blog! It is kind of a refresher course. You are in my prayers.

Barb said...

No one from southern Illinois yet, so Merry Christmas, Sister!

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas Sister Mary Martha. May God bless you and your fellow sisters this Christmas Season and may 2008 be a happy and healthy year for you all.
I can vouch for the "routine" issue - I still managed to homeschool my son most of the time when my DH was alive.
From Toronto, Ontario here.
(from my whole family - Me, Rob, George and Roc)


Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas Sister! The Rockets lost to the Nuggets, 111 to 112.
Love your blog!

the mother of this lot said...

Wishing you a happy and peaceful Christmas, Sister, from Manchester, England.

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas, to you and all your Sisters, from Michigan. Terentia

Anonymous said...


Feliz Navidad to you and the Sisters.

Anna :)

Tonda said...

I also wish you a Merry Christmas, but also have a question. Sorry... but anywase.
I was out doing last minute shopping and bumped into my cousin and his wife at a store.
What happened is as we were visiting, a young man shopping with whom I assume were his mother and sister came down the aisle behind me, my cousin took notice of the young man. Apparently the young mans punkish attire offended him greatly because the venomous things that began to pour out of his mouth, and look of what I definitely describe as hate sneered across my cousins face. You would think this young man had personally attacked my cousin in some way.
I was so ashamed and embarrassed. I quickly found myself silent and looking to the floor not wanting to participate in the conversation as he told his wife, "if you ever let my son come home like that... I will slit his throat". My cousin who is supposedly a dedicated Catholic, member of the Knights of Columbus and new father of a 14 day old son.
I just wanted to cry, thinking... how can someone Love God and hate someone he has never spoke a word to and just passed in the store. I don't know what I should have done. Should I have told him to stop, it was wrong and then probably got into an exchange of words with him myself? I just don't know? But all I ended up doing was looking at the floor until I thought he was finished, and then took up a different direction in conversation with his wife. Though he did continue to watch the young man, sneering all the time at him and mumbling beneath his breath.
I always thought others were supposed to see Christ in us. I wish I knew what I was supposed to have done, in case it ever comes up again. Maybe keeping my mouth shut was thr right thing? I just don't know.

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas!

This blog is one of my Christmas presents. I enjoy sharing your information and pictures with my family.


Kristin said...

merry Christmas!! ^_^

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas from Northwest Indiana!

PBXVI said...

Merry Christmas from Colorado!!! (Go Nuggets!!! LOL!) Actually I don't keep up with basketball at all! God Bless!

Sarah - Kala said...

Mary Christmas from another Marylander. Well, actually, I'm from Washington state, but the Navy has me by my husband's collar. It's good. May Our Lady keep you under her mantle of motherly love now and in 2008!!

catoblue said...


I need help with a question my friend asked me today. If anybody would have an answer, I figured it would be you.....

My friend asked me to show her where in the Bible Jesus tells us what day he was born on and where in the Bible he tells us to celebrate it every year. Ive looked and looked and looked but cant find it anywhere.

I normally use the Jerusalem or Douay Bible, but I even looked in the King James and also used a concordance at the library but I just cant find where it is.

Please help me, Sister, cause Im sure you know the answer. Id really like to show it to her tomorrow, being Christmas and all.

Thank you very much.

radio45 said...

Sister, Sometimes I, too, thik that instead of writing to a nun, I'm actually writing to the manager of the Wal-Mart who mascarades as a nun for this blog. But, nevertheless, it is talented. I should pray more for you and the others. Who knows, if you really are a manager of a Wal-Mart, you may need those prayers more! Merry Christmas from Florida

RadioPie said...

Tell a man there are 246 trillion stars in the sky, and he'll believe you. Tell him not to do a google image search for "Old Ladies," and he just HAS to test out your theory for himself...
My poor eyes!

Merry Christmas and God Bless You All!

Connie's Daughter said...

Merry Christmas, Sister! I love your blog!

Here's some more info to answer your reader's question: There is an order of nuns, Servants of the Eleventh Hour, founded by Mother Antonia, who gave up an affluent life in Beverly Hills to devote her life to the poor in Tijuana's prisons. Her order is specifically geared to older women who have already raised a family or had a career. Journalists Mary Jordan and Kevin Sullivan have written a book telling her story, titled The Prison Angel : Mother Antonia's Journey from Beverly Hills to a Life of Service in a Mexican Jail. It's a very compelling and inpsiring story! Mother Antonia seems to be a sort of Mother Teresa of Tijuana.

So it would seem that some women do get a call to a second vocation later in life.

God bless you and your fellow sisters!

Joyful Catholics said...

My friend of one year, and my "spiritual daughter" Sarah,just left last week for Panhandle Texas where she was accepted at the School Sisters of St Francis there in Panhandle. (Not the same order as the one in Milwaukee, btw) Sarah has been discerning the religious life for over 3 years. She was getting a little discouraged since no one would accept her because she has Spina Bifida. BUT this convent did, so she's tickled and I'm happy for her, but miss her so much. It is very ironic, as you say, Sister, that so many of the great Saints and Doctors of the Church weren't all perfect specimens of health and vigor. But if there are any other young women out there that have a disability such as Sarah, consider the School Sisters of Panhandle Texas, I know they're hoping to grow. Bless you all. Happy Epiphany tomorrow, too!