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Life is tough. Nuns are tougher.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Is It Still Summer?

Where have I been? Just a minute ago it was two weeks ago!  Sister St. Aloysius is off on her yearly Think Tank sabbatical. I thought I was going to have to go it alone with Sister Mary Fiacre, but it's really a two man job. A two nun job. A two person job.  We have it down to a science, getting her in and out of her wheelchair, and in and out of bed, the medication schedule, the TV shows that seem to entertain her. Trying to explain our inanely complex routine to an 'outsider' is almost embarrassing.

"You put the empty bread bag under her left foot and then pull her up and spin her around into the wheelchair."

"Bread bag?"

"Yes.  The bread bag under her foot lets her foot spin like a ballerina. Otherwise she could snap her ankle."

The bread bag was the brain child of Sister St. Aloysius.  Genuis. No wonder they have her at the Think Tank every year.

"If you cut the cookie into pieces and stick a piece between her fingers, she will eat it herself automatically. But you have to pry her fingers apart."

"Pry her fingers apart?"

"Yes. with your own fingers. You won't need any tools or a crowbar or anything."

Around this time, some people flee, with their hair on fire.

I had lined up several of the church ladies to drop in from time to time to pick up the slack. Or the bread bags. We were good to go.

You may remember that last year...was it last year? I lose track.  Anyhow, we had St. Nicolas during  Think Tank season. I didn't think I'd get any help from the powers that be this year.  It's harder and harder to find a spare nun anyplace. So you can imagine my surprise, just after returning from a whirlwind trip to the airport after we realized we misread the ticket and the time was 12 noon, not 12 midnight (poor Sister St. Aloysius thought she'd be sleeping through a redeye and didn't bring a thing to read, this is where a rosary is so handy!), to find a certain Sister Julianna parked on the door step with her little black bag.

I thought she was sitting down when I saw her, but she was standing up.  She's two feet tall!  No, she isn't.  But she is very tiny. I feel like a Yeti standing next to her. She's Cuban.

Actually, she isn't really.  We talk that way here in America.  "I'm Irish!"

No, you aren't.  You may be of Irish decent. But you are not Irish. If you go to Ireland and tell them you're Irish, they'll shake their heads and say, "You're an American."  And they'd be right.

Sister Julianna is of Cuban descent.  She does wonders with a sweet garlic sauce and those little bitty bananas. Who knew garlic and bananas would be a good thing. Although they did not agree with Sister Mary Fiacre at all. So we won't be having them again. I'll offer up my suffering for the Poor Souls in Purgatory.

So it's going very well! Her hair didn't go on fire when I showed her 'the routine' and she can pivot a person on a bread bag with the best of them.

We're back in business!


Bethy said...

Good luck, Sister MM! Enjoy the fried bananas! :)

mph said...

Yay, you're back (in blogland). I've missed you!

Joy said...

I am so glad you are back....I was getting a bit worried!
I am guessing these are not the sweet plantains she is using, but the sweet ones, when fried, are wonderful!

Tracy said...

Great to see you back, I was worried!

Claudia said...

I was a bit worried too. How do you make those bananas? I have leftover bananas and that would be a good way to use them before they go to waste.

I think you would just have to brush a persons hand with something and they will open their hand. As a nurse I have noted that happens a lot and ususally with things you do not want them to grab.

Anonymous said...

According to my church bulletin, here are some changes coming to the Roman Missal. On the usccb.org site website it says that changes will happen on Nov. 27 but it doesn't actually say WHAT the changes are. Do you know?

Maureen said...

Bananas....I THINK I can remember them. We had a little cyclone up north in January which wiped them from the face of Queensland - unless you can pay $15 a kilo for them.
Sometimes I am profligate, and save up to buy just one.....for the memories.

Anonymous said...

Soooooooo glad you are back. I need the blogs, look forward to them and have spread the word about them........I wish I had your ability and humor to handle problems.....Bless you. Anonymous C. Can't figure out the sign off stuff, not good on the comp and the grandkids aren't here to show me--so will just be anonymous C

Karen Fuller said...

oh so happy to see a new blogging from you!
i got and wore my new "work clothes" a white veil and white collar--and long black dress, black stocking and good decent walking shoes also black--so now iam in BUSINESS, as you might say.
when i put on that white veil for the first time--i knew this was the most right decision i ever made in my life--i have spent my life comparing all men to JESUS--now i do not have to do that--he is my Boss (as always) and now i feel like i have the best husband anyone could ever want. iam a non-denominational Nun--with no basic church and no fellow Nuns to work with me. iam looking for others like me, on the web. if you know of any--please tell me. because i was not a catholic at the time I became a Christian- because of that,i had no choice in what i could do for a ministry. when i was 17 (in the 1960's) the only ministry a woman could have was to be married to a minister--or become a missionary. i went to Bible schools and other places to find that MINISTER husband--not a one came of that search. at the same time i would go listen to missionaries. nothing came of that search either. for many yrs now, since i turned 45, i have asked God if he would accept VOWs from me like a nun makes? he said no--until last yr. Dec.3, i turned 64
and i made those vows with some extras that i felt were necessary for a Good ministry of healing and personal prophecy. He told me,
"now you must get a veil and dress for "WORK" as a Nun."
he went on to tell me that satan is scared to death of Nuns.he sees that veil and the rest--and he knows that they are MINE!
that they dont take "no" for an answer from man nor beast--and, he said, " I rarely tell them "NO" myself!"
so i did as told. and i wore that veil and the rest. but i think it was the VEIL that made me feel like i was armed and ready for battle in an army for my Lord and Savior.
here i was, looking like a weak, little, old, helpless, woman--it was a total disquise-because what i saw in the mirror was a "WARRIOR"
iam thanking God all the time, I feel beautiful--wrinkles, fat, ugly spots on my face-- but i was beautiful to JESUS!
please help me--if you can, to find others like me. i do think i could get more done if i were involved with others with the same goals--and what are they? to be obedient to Gods instruction and His word--and share HIS love through work for those who need me.
what do you think, Sister? iam new at his and need all the advice possible. i wrote before and told you that I was a member of our local Catholic church, which i love. but iam not sent out by the church to do what iam doing.
any help would be so much appreciated..i love your blog--i was waiting to read the next one--i love your humor...iam not the only one it seems! God bless you, Sister Karen Elise (i wish i could send i photo)

Lisa said...

Oh, Sister Karen Elise, I am afraid for you because St Augustin and St Martin and St Gregory and St Teresa and other people who know about monks and nuns always said it's very important to be in a community with a rule. It helps to keep the brothers and sisters loving and humble. Have you talked with professed women religious about joining an order? Lots of love to you from Lisa

Anonymous said...

Saint Andrew of Scot.....

How does someone go about asking you a question?

Anonymous said...

Here's my question....At what time in history did Catholics decide to condemn Masonry or The Order of the Eastern Star? Are they the same? HELP!

I bought some religious items from an Estate Sale. The estate lot had a membership to the Fresno Chapter of The order of The Eastern Star. The membership holder was a Nun. I have her holy cards, letters she has written with her signature, friends memorial cards( including a few priests) and other devotional items.

I wasn't really surprised by her membership, however others looked at it has the devil walked into the room! How can a Nun be in the Eastern Star? Can Catholics be a Mason? I'm not armed with such knowledge can you help me?

Arkanabar T'verrick Ilarsadin said...

it is not easy to enter a convent late in life, but that doesn't rule out any such charism. Here's what I would recommend:

First, get thee to thy local parish, and ask about converting! The RCIA process is pretty lengthy, and usually people are accepted into full communion with Holy Mother Church at Easter. If you get started now, you may be ready by then. Having converted, look into various lay apostolates and ministries, such as Third Order Franciscans, Third Order Dominicans, Opus Dei, and the like.

Also, read the lives of the saints. You, like all of us, are called to sainthood, and you ought to find an example (or three, or more) of people who were like you, or were empowered by God to do as you truly are meant to do, or both.

Karen Fuller said...

thank you so much for your kind and thoughtful words! in 1994 i was called, by God, to go to the local Catholic church and get Baptized--i went through the adult teaching class--(i was the star pupil TOO) and to my surprise i fell in love with MY NEW CHURCH and the members--so, Iam a member of my local Catholic church--got that done! but i have been called to be an independant Non-denominational Nun. JESUS gives me the ORDERS--i only obey Him. but i would like to find others like myself--if any are out there. thank you again--so sweet are your words, that i can feel the LOVE with which they were written, God is blessing us all! i pray he blesses you EXTRA! love and hugs,
Sister Karen Elise

Karen Fuller said...

i love Garlic--i love bananas. i will try and fry some together and see what happens!
i have noticed that people who like garlic are NICE people and people who do NOT--are not.--but that is only my own observation :0)

mph said...

@Karen-Elise, I have to disagree with you, I love garlic, my Mum doesn't like it and she's a much nicer person than me, in fact probably a much nicer person than most people I know! My own theory was that people who like dogs are nice and those that don't aren't, but then I found out Hitler adored his dogs, so that ones out the window as well!

Karen Fuller said...

ha ha--thank you, i enjoyed that. but my experiences(with non-lovers of GARLIC) is all i truly have to go by. i can eat garlic as iam cooking--oh! just love that burn!.
love it more as i lick my fingers!
maybe its not that these people are not garlic lovers--maybe i have it all wrong--they just do not care for my BREATH? i must have misunderstood entirely! maybe they really are NICE--but i chased them away! would you run from the cook when she hands you a clove of GARLIC and says"EAT!"??? i just thought they were NOT nice...got it all wrong didnt I?...well, I do love it! i wish i lived in GILROY CA. it is not that far away from me...only wish the wind would drift the aroma of GARLIC fields in the direction of Sonora,CA.

Anonymous said...

re: Changes in the Roman Missal.

Short answer: just about every prayer you say during Mass will change in its "official" wording. Or, perhaps better said, people will tell you that you have to change what you say.

Longer answer. Go back to the USCCB site (http://www.usccb.org/prayer-and-worship/roman-missal/index.cfm) and look at the "related information" menu on the right side (in green, probably for Ordinary Time. Who knows.) If you extend it (click 'see all 20 pages') you'll find a link to Changes in the People's Prayers. There is one for Changes in thr Priest's prayers, too...

Whole lotta words changing for reasons that elude the average pray-er and don't have much to do with knowing and loving God, and living likewise. But that's just my opinion.

Karen said...

Your posts make me smile :)