Holy Helpers

We have had some wonderful saintly help from our readers for the lovelorn. It's been several years since we took up a collection of saint poems for various problems, from St. Boniface and St. Frances Cabrini (for parking spots and car trouble) to St. Anthony, who can find anything (husbands included).

I had forgotten about St. Anne!  
"St. Anne, St. Anne, send me a man."

Poor St. Anne. Little effort was made formulating this saint poem. It seems her patronage of the unmarried might hinge only on the fact that her name rhymes with "man".  The same reason St. Boniface is the patron saint of the parking place. We could just as easily turn to St. Dorothy for the same purpose. "St. Dot, St. Dot, help me find a parking spot." 

 I digress.

St. Anne is indeed a patron saint for finding a husband. And equestrians. I can't think why on either front. Granted, St. Anne was married.  So? A lot of saints were married. Happily married. We could make the case that she would have been the very earliest married saint. 

But horses? I'm sure St. Ann did not have a horse. St. Anne having a horse would be like Jesus having a car. The most Jesus ever had was a borrowed donkey for a few minutes. Perhaps it is because some medieval knights rode under her banner. They each had a horse, I'll bet.

I also neglected to mention the age old invocation of St. Catherine of Alexandria. 

"A husband, St. Catherine;
A handsome one, St. Catherine;
A rich one, St. Catherine;
A nice one, St. Catherine; 
And soon, St. Catherine!"

Here, no one even bothered to find a rhyme scheme.  We can only hope that by "rich" the author meant the other ways one can be rich in life: rich in friends, in spirit, in hope, in happiness.  Because praying for Mr. Moneybags is not something Jesus would like you to do.  WWJNLYTD.

This is another poser to me, like St. Agnes, because St. Catherine had not one thing to do with marriage. She was one of the Fourteen Holy Helpers before they were relegated to the list of has been saints. I think that may be how she got grabbed for the Christian Mingles.  Don't worry that St. Catherine is gone from the saint roster! It's just that there was WAY too much legend going on with the Holy Helpers and so the Church decided to not encourage more confusion. 

I think we should have some holy helpers! Let's make a new list! 

We know St. Joseph and St. Anthony are shoe ins.  I don't think we need fourteen. Twelve, I think, like apostles.  Leave your suggestions in the comments section!