Meanwhile, in Heaven

Hi Sister - in the spirit of St. Valentine's Day, I have a question about a saint for married men. Of course, St. Joseph immediately sprang to mind, but he seemed happily married! I wonder if there is a saint you could recommend for the following: My sisters and I would like to pray a novena to ask for protection for our father from his second wife. She is nominally a Catholic, but treats him in an unChristian way. He is in his 70s, and in good health, but she is 10 years younger and always calling him old man and talking about assisted living and how the old should not be taking care of the old. We fear for him. He can come live with any of us any time he wants, but as a truly devoted Catholic man (who had a very good marriage with our mother before she passed away), he holds marriage in high esteem and I cannot imagine him ever leaving. (There is much more to the story, but I am leaving the really ugly bits about the second wife out, in case she finds this blog & recognizes.)

There are a few saints that pop into mind. But before we turn to Heaven for help, let's try one important thing. Take your dad out and talk with him. Find out how he actually feels. Does he feel trapped and harassed? Is he miserable and afraid? Because he might not feel the way you do about his situation. And if that's the case you'll have to bow out.

Meanwhile, in Heaven, we have:

Two saints who needed protection: St. Dymphna, whose father came after her because she looked just like her dead mother. When Dymphna ran away, he hunted her down and killed her. 

St. Barbara, also had a father who killed her. He had locked her in a tower to preserve her chastity. The tower had two windows and Barbara had a third window installed to remind herself of the Holy Trinity. Her father was convinced she had it put in so the boys could visit. After he killed her, lightening struck him dead. Because of the tower, she is the patron saint of sailors at sea, and because of the lightening, she is the patron saint against lightening and the patron saint of those people who do those elaborate fireworks displays on the Fourth of July and every day at Disneyland.

The patron saint for bad marriages: St. Rita.  Rita prayed for her husband, but he was a bad egg and was bumped off by the mafia.

St. Monica's husband was no picnic either, but she prayed him and her sin loving son, St. Augustine, into Heaven.

There is some serious speculation that St. Louis IX of France was happy to stay away on Crusades so as not to be home with his wife.

If the situation is dire and threatening, you could all take Mrs. Dad aside and tell her, "We're watching you."

And so is Heaven.