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Life is tough. Nuns are tougher.

Monday, December 28, 2009

Four Calling Birds

Sister St. Aloysius
is in full cooking throttle. We generally don't have much to do except feed ourselves. The day's dilemma of cooking doesn't get much past, "What can Sister Mary Fiacre chew?" Even that can often be remedied by cutting things up into very small pieces.

We have house guests! That never happens. We have duffle bags and back packs strewn everywhere and every pillow and blanket gone to work. The storms and canceled flights in the east have caused our little house to be a way station for people who would have otherwise been sleeping at the airport. We're not all that far from LAX. A stone's throw by LA traffic standards. Happily, these people are young enough to weather a night on the couch or the floor.

I am capable of spreading a night on the floor or the couch, but many souls will be rescued from Purgatory in the process.

In any case, we've had a grand time stretching the groceries six ways to Sunday and stirring up breakfast for all. They will trickle out one by one as their flights are rescheduled. Maybe someone will be inspired to join the convent after their little stay here.

A nun can dream can't she?

Back to work:

Any suggestions for a patron saint against apartment building neighbors who play annoying music at high volumes at all hours of the day and night? Barring that, any suggestions for a patron saint to help me not be so annoyed by said music?

I can make a few suggestions. You'll have to pick.

You could go with the patron saint of accordion players: Our Lady of Spain.

That was a little musical joke.

You could go with a saint that was a hermit. My pick is St. Rosalia, the patron saint for people who want to get away from it all. She went off to live in a cave and apparently wasn't missed. The cave caved in on her and it was years before anyone found her remains, at which point someone must have said, "Oh yeah! I remember her...." Her remains were taken back to town where there was a big plague going on and everyone was cured. That's a nutshell version, but you get the drift. I think she actually hid in two different caves because somebody found her the first time. Something along those lines.

You could go with saints that help with headaches, like St. Stephen, the patron saint of headaches. His feast day was just the other day! The first martyr, he was hit in the head, among other places, with a rock. Or St. Bibiana, the patron saint of hangovers (because she had to drink lead). St. John the Baptist is also a patron saint for headaches. We all know what happened to his head.

Actually ...come to think of it ....we don't. There are several places that claim to have his head.

I highly recommend St. Therese the Little Flower, the patron saint for people who are annoyed by the annoying habits of others. She wanted to make sure she offered up everything she could for the Poor Souls in Purgatory, so she kept meticulous lists of every slight and annoyance suffered from being at all times behind the cloister walls with a group of nuns. It must have been a very long list.

There is your heavenly help. But let me give you two bits of earthly advice.

One: Follow the example of St. Therese the Little Flower and offer up the horrible pounding and screeching. Think of the souls you could help!

Two: Talk to the person in charge of your building and tell them to please make it stop. That's their job. In our neighborhood you can make all the noise you want between 8am and 4pm and after that if I call the police they will come and tell you to shut it down.

Three: If all else fails, DANCE.


Diane said...

Thanks to your blog, Saint Rosalia is beginning to lose obscure status.

Sister Mary Margaret said...

I was forced to play the accordian for eight long years as a child. Whew! Glad that's over! Your "Our Lady of Spain" joke made me laugh out loud! There's no one home except me and the cat, and the cat looks at me like I'm crazy whenever I laugh out loud!

Tami said...

Great advice!