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Life is tough. Nuns are tougher.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Drip, Drip, Drip

I have been inundated with patron saint requests over at our shop. As patron saint matching is just about my favorite past time, I've had a pleasant inundation. What a wonderful time of year! Easter Season, spring, patron saint matching and the NBA playoffs. In the end, I will have some suffering to offer up for the Poor Souls in Purgatory, as I am not a Laker fan, even though I live here, and they are sure to win the whole magilla this year. But yesterday was saw a breathtaking playoff game between Chicago and Boston. I'm rooting for Boston, but I spent a very long time in Chicago during the heyday of Mr. Michael Jordan. The series is tied 1-1, which is great for me, as I don't have to decide yet for whom I am rooting.

Thank goodness things have been so relaxing. Not so for most people, judging from the requests I've been getting. I have had no difficulty whatsoever finding saints for everyone. Some even more easy breezy lemon squeezy than others:

As a high school Junior, I am currently preparing myself the dreaded college admissions process. I know, I know, offer it up for the church suffering. But I was wondering if you could possibly match me and my applications up with some saintly aid for the long and arduous months ahead. (And having some holy help when the admissions officers are reading my applications wouldn't be too horrible, either.) Thanks in advance!

Two saints spring to mind. "Long and arduous, " did you say? You can't get more long and arduous than St. Isidore, the patron saint of the internets. Poor St. Isidore wasn't the brightest bulb. If that wasn't enough, all of his brothers and sisters were saints. Not the "Oh, that guy is such a good man! He's a saint" type saint. They are actually canonized saints. It gets worse: his brother was his teacher.

Saint though he was, St. Isidore's brother was a stern task master with little patience for Isidore's laziness and bumbling, even if St. Isidore was neither lazy nor bumbling. I have to go out on a limb here and say that St. Isidore's brother was pretty rotten to him, saintship notwithstanding.

It doesn't matter, though, because it all worked out. St. Isidore ran away from his brother's scholarly brutality. Hanging around in the meadows he observed water dripping on a rock and reflected on how, eventually, the water would leave its mark on the rock and how very, very long that would take.

I had a piano teacher who used to say to me, "Don't say it's hard. Say it will take longer to learn."

That's the very epiphany that St. Isidore had. He returned home and studied with renewed vigor. He became the most educated man in the entire world. And a saint to boot.

Here's a second saint for you, one who knew how to lock himself in a room and study: St. Jerome. He picked up a little Hebrew in his travels and decided he should take a crack at re-translating the Bible into Latin from the original language instead of from Hebrew to Greek to Latin. His translation is the one we use today, known as the "Vulgate". (Since we are still using his translation, I think he fills the bill for the admissions people who have to read your applications, too.)

At the end of his life, he locked himself in a room in Bethlehem and never left it. His pal, St. Paula, who had a lot of dough, brought him endless books to read and write about and translate.

Both of these saints understand the hard work of study. Or.... that it will take longer to learn some things than others.


Monica said...

It was a good request to ask for a saint to watch over the college admissions process! I'll pass this along to my daughter who is stressing about the same thing.

Anonymous said...

Hello Sister,
While you're Saint-matching...which Saint should I ask for help if I'm trying to start a romantic relationship with someone?

J. said...

Hi Sister,

Can I ask for ideas for a patron saint?

I have same-sex attraction, which I would really like to overcome. Is there any saint I could pray to?

I've prayed to Our Blessed Virgin Mother, St. Augustine, and St. Agnes for purity and chastity, and with their intercessions and God's grace I no longer fall to lust or sins of the flesh; however, I'm still far more attracted to my own sex than the opposite sex. Is there any saint who can help me?

Thank you, Sister. I enjoy your blog immensely!

Cassandra said...

St. Ignatius springs to mind as well. He had to go back to grade school to get into college!

Aunty Belle said...

Well, now, ya' gotta be intrigued by a Sister who writes "Drip Drip Drip" an' then moves directly into inundation.

Ain't sure how I got here, but mebbe thar's a saint for fallin' down the right rabbit holes--meanin' I'se tickled to have found ya Sister MM.

But now that I'se here, mayhap I can share an "internet" saint wif' ya'. Onc't I had the fun of meetin' a Sister who worked at the Vatican (the geeky shoes is a dead give away.) Her job was settin' up the Vatican web site, coordinatin' the computer whiz-kids and such. She said the patron saint of the Vatican's web works was the Archangel Gabriel--chief of communications.

(side note: I wanted to be a Sister meself. But that ugly shoe situation hung me up. So I got married and ended up barefoot an' pregnant instead. Doan God have jes' the grandest sense of humor? Anyhow, I'm jes' sayin' I think some elegant shoes would improve any vocations drive.)

Aunty Belle said...

Mercy Maud!

(doan upload this comment --it's jes' fer yore own amusement)

Insomniacs must do something quiet out of consideration for the non-insomniacs who snore nearby.

So--as ya know from he previous comment I made--while readin' in the wee hours of the night, I fell down some cyber portal and landed on yore blog--an readin' backwards to acquaint meself wif' all the doings around here, I made it to the Brownie Theology. Very funny, in a smiley sort of way--but I gave a hoot out loud at yore response to the bewildered non-Catholic who could not grasp the purpose of purgatory:

"so let me get this straight...I kill you, say I'm sorry and go to heaven? Shouldn't I have a better understanding of my evil act before I get to heaven?


I go about my merry life 'believing in Jesus" and walking by all the homeless people judging them as winos and stepping into Target to buy a new set of coffee mugs with chihuahuas on them and go home to watch "The Bachelor" and I'm still going straight to heaven? What a good deal!!!!!

It is just this sort of thinking that leads me to worry about the possibilty of a future war in heaven. "

Howling hilarious. (an' great theology) Bless Ya'!

Arkanabar T'verrick Ilarsadin said...


I encourage you to seek out the Courage Apostolate, which I learned of at Courageman's blog.

J. said...

Thank you, Arkanabar. I am familiar with Courage (and Courageman's blog). Though there aren't any meetings near me that I can attend, I was extremely comforted simply by the fact that they existed when I was in the process of joining the Church last year. I know that Courage helps many people with SSA to live chastely. They are doing God's work!